Tom Deus and Clay on top of the Alex Johnson Hotel with Rapid City below

It’s easier to get things done with kindness than commands

It was the first time I’d seen a tour director and a coach driver yelling it out, and this was a seasoned tour director, at least that’s what she told me. She shared with me that she’d been to one of America’s premier tour schools and that drivers work for you. What I know, and was confirmed today, is that drivers can be your best friend or your worst nightmare. After all, they drive the coach, and if they refuse to drive, your tour is dead in the water. If anything, your driver is your partner, and today I witnessed both how to get things done and how not to get things done. 

I work for a company that does white labeling which means a small local tour operator can hire us to put together a tour in an area that they are unfamiliar with. That was the case with the small company that brought their group out west to tour the Grand Tetons and Yellowstone National Park. The first red flag was that they were doing the tour backwards, going from Jackson, Wyoming to South Dakota, ending in the less remarkable Black Hills instead of the, well the name says it all, Grand Tetons. 

The itinerary

As I reviewed the itinerary the week before, I began to see other peculiarities. On our drive through the Grand Tetons, the director had us making photo stops at viewpoints only a couple miles apart. I asked my boss about this, and she said the tour director had driven the trip the year before and had been very difficult to work with as she wanted to micro manage all the details of the trip, despite the fact that she had paid us to plan the trip.

On the itinerary, these stops were only 5 minutes each, but one needs to factor a busload of seniors getting on and off the coach, which in itself takes 10 minutes. The other thing that was odd is that I was not included in the raft trip or several of the dinners. While it is common to not include the driver (though many do since they become a part of the group when treated well), it is unheard of to not include the director.

When I called her beforehand, she insisted that she knew the whole route and that she was sure the itinerary could be followed. I could only assure her that we would follow it until we couldn’t. She also pointed out how I would have many evenings off to enjoy myself during the tour. While she tried to paint it as a gift, I knew what she really meant was that she was too cheap to include me in the group dinners. Believe me, by the time the tour was over, I was grateful for her gift!

The micro management

As the tour commenced, she frequently commented that the daily itinerary was up to me but she was often quick to step in and begin running things. One of the most peculiar things she did was to assign tables for dinner. Traditionally, we arrive at a restaurant and people can sit where they like. The tour director informed me that she would be assigning tables so she needed me to contact the restaurants in advance to find out the number of seats at each table.

I informed her that, in the current environment, it was unlikely to know ahead of time what the table arrangement would be until we arrived as it was dependent upon staffing and how busy the restaurant was before we arrived. She insisted that she’d been doing this for years and, thankfully, agreed to take the responsibility off my plate. She would call the restaurants herself to make the arrangements.

There were many times during the tour when I wondered why she had contracted with our company at all. I remember during the first luggage pull that she told me that all the bags were there and there was no need for me to track them. The driver gave me a puzzled look, but I decided not to argue with her. The next morning I got to the bus early and tagged all of the bags.

You see, if you simply load all the bags onto the bus that the hotel bus staff bring to you, you have no idea if they are the right number or if they are even the right bags. Sometimes you’ve got more than one tour group at the hotel leaving their bags outside the door, and you don’t want to bring someone else’s bag with you or leave one of your people’s bags behind. By assigning numbered tags to each person’s luggage on my roster, I immediately know if a bag is missing and whose it is. That way I know exactly what room to go looking for it in.

Itinerary suggestions

As we progressed to the latter part of the trip, the driver and I reviewed the upcoming days together. We were scheduled to drive from Wyoming to South Dakota. He asked me why we were going to return to Devil’s Tower on the following day when we’d be driving right past it on the way to South Dakota. I told him that I thought she wanted her group to have enough time to hike around the tower. He laughed and said, “have you seen her group?” I had to agree since just the day before no one would get off the bus to explore the town because they didn’t want to walk the two blocks back to the hotel.

Clay shared with me that most groups just stop at the Trading Post outside the monument, snap a picture and move on; something we could easily have done on our way to South Dakota. Not only are there great restrooms and a gift shop, but the better picture of the Tower is from the gift shop since you end up being too close when you drive into the park and up to the visitor’s center.

View from the visitor’s center
View from the trading post

My tour director insisted we do it her way, and sternly warned us against saying anything contrary to her plan in front of the others. It was an odd warning as we had never said anything within earshot of the passengers, nor as professionals would we. I did have to assure the passengers, as we drove by the sign for Devil’s Tower, not to worry; that we would return the next day for a glorious visit.

When we got to the visitor’s center the following day, most were surprised to see it was nothing more than a trailer, and half the group opted to ride back down to the Trading Post with the bus since it couldn’t park at the top. That also meant that the “hiking” group was stuck up there for an hour and a half since there was no cell service, and the bus could only return at a pre-arranged time. Though we had warned her about this when we presented her with the easier option the day before, she insisted that it would be fine. I was pleased, at least for her sake, that I didn’t overhear anyone questioning why we had backtracked two hours to see something we could have seen the day before.

Things begin to fall apart

The redundancy played itself out again when we visited Mount Rushmore. On the itinerary, she had us visiting two times on different days: once to see the monument and a second time for the night show. I had asked her why she didn’t plan both visits on the same day with dinner in between. She reminded me that this is what she thought was best, despite the fact that Mount Rushmore was 45 minutes from the budget accommodation she had chosen to stay outside of Rapid City.

It was at the end of the first visit where things finally fell apart. Whether it was watching her plan fail or having us question her too many times, things were only made worse when we arrived at Mount Rushmore the same time as a lightning storm. Having driven this far, she insisted everyone get off the bus, and told the driver to stay on the bus in case we had to return. The request itself was not unusual, but the fact that the request was made in the form of a command and she’d been overriding all of Clay’s suggestions up until then brought the matter to a head.

Mount Rushmore, not in its best light

The storm came in with full force but people were spread out, having been told they had an hour at the site. It was too remote for cell reception, and our tour director was unable to ascertain whether Clay was at the bus. I ran back to find that he was and began to usher everyone back. Once we returned to the hotel and everyone got off the bus, the tour director confronted Clay about her expectations in a way that suggested he was to be at her beck and call and not to leave the bus at anytime.

Things fall apart

Clay, having been shown little respect the whole trip, began yelling back at her. I suggested we close the door of the bus since there were still guests hanging outside the bus. We’ve all been there, and sometimes it is the only way to release the pressure, but I can personally say I have never yelled at anyone at any point while on a tour. 

She stormed off the bus, and Clay asked if I’d like to go downtown for a drink. As part of the tour director’s cost saving measures, we were at a hotel 15 minutes from downtown. Clay, knowing I’d never seen Rapid City, suggested we go downtown and he’d show me around. This was his response after being torn down by someone; to show me kindness.

Clay shows me Rapid City

This was the last day of our tour, and he planned to have a drink so he suggested we take a cab instead of the bus. Unfortunately we couldn’t find one, and I thought we were going to have to give up the endeavor until he got off the phone and said a shuttle from one of the downtown hotels was coming to pick us up from our hotel. I didn’t understand why they would do that, but he said he knew the driver on duty and asked him if he could come pick us up.  

As we got out of the car at the downtown hotel, Clay slipped the driver a $10 bill, less than it would have cost us had there been a taxi. We headed into the heart of town, and Clay pointed out the statue of Jefferson in bronze. He said a fun game to play with tourists who liked to come into town is to have them find the presidents. Apparently all of them are cast in bronze and stand on one of 46 street corners in Rapid City.

I’ll be honest, I was a little underwhelmed by Rapid City, knowing it to be the 2nd largest city in the state. Of course, we’re talking about a state with a total population of 879,000. With the exception of the Alex Johnson hotel, most buildings in the city were only 2 stories high. We headed into Paddy O’Neill’s Irish Pub & Grill on the ground floor of the Alex Johnson hotel.

I asked Clay about going to the top, but he said that you have to pay $25 unless you’re a guest at the hotel. I enjoyed my Manhattan and even acquiesced to have a second when Clay said he was paying for it. After dinner, I went to the restroom, and when I returned, Clay had paid the bill and summoned me to follow him. With the bartender in the lead, we headed for the elevator, and he swiped his key to give us access to the Penthouse. I can only assume this was the result of a conversation he had with Clay and a generous tip left for dinner.

Stepping onto the rooftop patio of the Alex Johnson was like stepping out of South Dakota and into New York City. The decor was modern, everyone one was finely dressed, and the food looked like it was made by a Michelin chef. Another thing that struck me was the number of same sex couples dining together. Clay told me that outside of media and national politics, people here just all get along and respect each other. That reminded me a lot of how he was.

Atop the tallest building in Rapid City, the private club known as Vertex offered beautiful views of the surrounding countryside. We took a couple pictures and headed back down to street level to take in the rest of the city. There wasn’t much, and we covered it in less than 30 minutes. Still, there was a surprising number of restaurants and a large building converted to a food hall.

Getting things done with kindess

When we returned to the hotel, we were told that the shuttle driver had gone home for the evening. I wasn’t sure what we were going to do, but after Clay had a brief conversation with the night manager, we were in the shuttle and on our way to our hotel.

I asked him how he did it again. He mentioned that at the end of each season, he treats the whole staff to pizza. In addition, he regularly brings the staff pies that he picks up during a restroom stop in the middle of the Big Horn mountains. Not only did Clay know the driver, but they talked about his new hunting bow most of the way to the hotel. Clay tipped him $10, and we exited the shuttle.

 As I headed back to my room, I thought about how grateful I was to Clay, not just for showing me around Rapid City but for showing me how much people are willing to give if you treat them with gratitude and not directives.